A while ago I was kicked off the “Relationship Train”. I wasn’t expecting to depart so I stood around the station for a while trying to figure out where to go next. And there were options. I could hop on the “Rebound Train”, “Whore Train”(which connects with other trains on the “Bad Decisions” line), “Gonna Be Lonely And Depressed Forever Train”, I could even meet someone at the station and get back on the “Relationship Train”. After some thought, I decided to hop on the “Single Train”. It looked fun, casual, and full of options.
After making my decision and being a rider for a couple weeks, I’ve noticed some pros and cons to being single.
PRO: I can eat whatever I want, wherever I want, whenever I want. I don’t have to wait until someone else is hungry or ask what they’re in the mood for or deal with them judging me for what I order.
CON: When I’m indecisive about what to eat (which is often, I admit), I can’t just say “You decide”
PRO: When I go out, I can go wherever and stay however long I choose.
CON: When I go out, I have to either work out logistics of a ride or not drink since I don’t have anyone to share driving responsibilities with. (*Though you could probably look at not being able to drink as saving money and a pro*)
PRO: I can sprawl out in my queen sized bed and take up as much room as I want. I can drown in covers, or I can throw them off to the side and don’t have to worry about making someone else an uncomfortable temperature.
CON: My dog doesn’t like to snuggle.. so I don’t have anyone to snuggle me when I’m cold.. or just in general.
PRO: If I have the opportunity to drink a few too many, I won’t be judged…by anyone I know. And if I get sick, nobody will see it and be able to say “Maybe you shouldn’t have had those last couple shots”
CON: I don’t have anyone to make sure I get where I need to be safely or hold my hair back or get me some water or take care of me.
PRO: I can sleep with strangers that I meet at a bar.
CON: I’m probably not going to do that. I like respecting myself.
PRO: I can have a “friend with benefits” with no expectations, no feelings, no worries.
CON: Hmm.. can’t really think of one for that.. Oh except for the chance that one person could fall for the other or it could be awkward when it ends..and it might be tricky to find a friend you’re comfortable enough with that would be up for it. But otherwise, that’s a solid pro if you can make it work out.
PRO: I don’t have to spend a bunch of money on gifts for Valentine’s Day, Christmas, birthdays, anniversaries, etc.
CON: No special gifts for me on those days..and I like putting thought into a gift for someone special.
PRO: I can flirt with anyone.
CON: It might not be reciprocated. Hello rejection. You send a flirty text to someone in a relationship, they’re likely going to respond and then warm fuzzies for all.
PRO: I can go to bed as late as I want or sleep as late as I want.
CON: The reality- I have no one to give me a reason to stay up late, and nobody to snuggle and fall back asleep with when I wake up early in the morning.
PRO: I can buy as many new items of clothing I want. And spend hours shopping.
CON: I don’t have anyone to appreciate how nice my ass looks in a new pair of jeans.
PRO: I am able to figure myself out and “learn to love me”
CON: That’s a lonely process filled with a lot of harsh realities.
PRO: I don’t have to worry if “his” friends or family like me or pretend to be nice to the ones I’m not a fan of.
CON: The only friends and family I have are my own.
I could do this all day. It’s really all a matter of preference and while I’m definitely a relationship person (I’ve dated 3 guys in the last 8+ years and this is the longest I’ve been single..ever), I can respect the positives to being single for a little bit. I don’t want to ride this “Single Train” long term, but while I’m on it – I am going to try to enjoy it!