Dear Mr. Prius Driver,

Dear Prius driver on the way to work this morning:
Your car pisses me off. So do you. I’m all about reducing carbon footprints and stuff and I think it’s great that you had the option to do so and you took it. When I last purchased a vehicle, I needed an SUV and if a hybrid one had been available in my price range and came with the options I wanted/needed, I would have taken the opportunity too (as long as it was visually appealing- let’s be honest). So first, I’ll give you a virtual pat on the back for being fuel friendly.

Now, however, I am going to ridicule you endlessly on your driving skills. I know that the Prius isn’t known for being a speed demon off the line (or top end…or in general) but I feel like the wind was blowing with more gusto than your foot on the gas when the light turned green. NEWSFLASH- Colorado isn’t super windy. Sure, you were probably about 60 and maybe didn’t have anywhere to be, so what’s the rush- it’s not like it’s 7:30 and everyone is on their way to wor- … oh yea! It was indeed!

If you want to drive slow, that’s fine I guess. I personally suggest you do it in the right lane…and make sure you’re fully in the right lane. See, this morning when I was already late for work (I realized in the shower I had to be at work a half hour earlier than usual)- you opted to be in the middle of the turning lane and the left lane. I don’t know if you’re scared the oncoming traffic is going to hit you head on, but you keep that nonsense up and you should be scared of the angry little girls in full sized V8 SUVs behind you. My jeep, Jeffrey, has been in a little fight before when a teeny little Honda merged into him- guess who’s still running like a pro and could easily take out a Prius? DING DING DING- you got that right, Jeffrey for the win!

One more thing- if you’re going to drive down the middle of a driving lane and a turning lane, please, for the love of all that is good- check your blinkers and use appropriately. What you maybe don’t remember is you turned your blinker on shortly after the green light…and started driving in the middle. Of course, I anticipated you were going to turn left somewhere (don’t know where I would have found that silly idea) so I didn’t try too hard to get over into the right lane because I figured soon enough you’d be out of my way and the left lane was where I needed to be and at that time of day it’s wise to stay in the lane you need when you are closing in on 6-8 blocks away. Five blocks and two stop lights later- you turned. And may you pray you never see me again. My brakes might “fail” or something equally awful and unavoidable.

Now- to the makers of the Prius, Toyota. Pat on the back for the concept. Quick question though- couldn’t you have designed something with a little bit of style? If a person is going to lose all of their horsepower, and therefore respect, shouldn’t it at least look nice? I sometimes think just looking at such an ugly vehicle makes me angry.

Did a google search- page one. also from This guy’s blog

I’m not saying you need to create an environmentally friendly Maserati looking thing (though, sign me up if you do)- but give it a little edge. Appeal to Gen Y a little bit. We’re the ones driving for the next 50 years. Truth be told if I have to pick between a goofy looking soccer mom car that gets a few extra MPGs and a 5.0 v8 Mustang– it’s Mustang, hands down- EVERY time. If the man who irritated me this morning had been driving a Mustang I would have thought, “He’s probably driving down the middle because he’s scared all that power is going to send him a little sideways if he hit’s the gas too hard…I hope it does so I can see it and start my day off with a smile…I’m so jealous he has that to worry about.” Maybe tomorrow.

Make THAT in an environmentally friendly hybrid form (as long as I still have a little get up and go) and I’m SOLD! *google-2013 shelby



About dawn of april

Figuring life and the "about me" out as I go :) In a nutshell: I work, go to school, run a women's book club, support the local music scene in Denver, and whatever else floats my boat at the time.
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7 Responses to Dear Mr. Prius Driver,

  1. diannegray says:

    LOL – Excellent! I’ve been behind drivers like that before – very annoying!

  2. Lilly Sue says:

    haha my buddy always says about the slow drivers, “if you don’t need to get anywhere quickly, ride a damn bicycle or walk!” It would do us all a favor 🙂

  3. Pingback: Use your Freaking Blinker « Pocketful of Joules

  4. Brilliant, but a word of advice. Just push the bastard off the road next time. You’ll be doing all other road users a favour. Honest.

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